You have heard of coyote ugly, right? That’s when you wake up with your arm around a girl so ugly, that you would rather gnaw your arm off than risk waking her up.
Then there is also double coyote ugly…that’s a girl so ugly that you would rather gnaw off your arm than risk waking her up…then…when you get back home, you gnaw off your other arm, cause you know that ugly beast is gonna be looking for a one-armed man.
Saturday night, ‘Out in the west Texas town of El Paso’, the Sooners defeated UTEP 24-7. Yes, the Sooners won, but it wasn’t pretty. How ugly you ask? Well, if this game had been a girl, it would have been coyote ugly.
While the Sooners returned home victorious, they no doubt woke up Sunday morning a little embarrassed about the situation they found themselves in.
But whereas you will go to any extreme, even self-mutilation, to reach the goal of not awakening the ugly girl…OU fans can only hope that this game gnaws at the Sooners players and coaches enough to serve as a wake up call.
Look, I hate to ‘cry wolf’ after one game…especially a victory…but the OU team I saw play in the Sun Bowl Saturday night was not a top ten or even top 20 football team. I don’t feel like I am going too far out of a ‘limb’ when I say that if not for UTEP’s bad luck, bad conditioning and atrociously bad kicking, Sooner fans might have awaken Sunday morning to find themselves staring at a double coyote ugly situation . Believe me…a loss against UTEP to start the season would have really had the Sooner Nation up in arms…at least until we chewed them both off.
THE
SEASON OPENER
The music charts were filled with songs by the likes
of Nine Inch Nails, Sneaker Pimps and Hanson, a boy band from Tulsa. If you wanted to go watch the Titanic sink,
Men in Black or Jurassic Park, it would cost you $4.50. The Dow Jones closed above 7000 for the first
time, residents of Hong Kong needed to brush up on their Chinese, and a little
storm named El Nino started being blamed for almost everything. Tiger Woods won his first Masters at age 21,
Mike Tyson bit off Evander Holyfield’s ear, President Clinton was starting his
second term, and when her car crashed in a Paris tunnel, Princess Di…did. The year was 1997 and until last Saturday night, it was the last time that OU opened the season with a game outside of the state of Oklahoma (OU played @ Tulsa in 2002, the only other time the opener has not been at home since 1997).
In August of ‘97, the Sooners played Northwestern at Soldier Field in Chicago. I remember it well, because I was there. The game was called the Pigskin Classic. They could have saved some lettering on the t-shirts and just called it The Pig…because it was anything but a classic. I had very low expectations for OU that year, expectations that were immediately met when the Sooners got thrashed 24-0 by a Northwestern team that would go on to finish 7th in the Big 10 Conference. The OU coach was John Blake…enough said? Yes, I thought so.
Lord, who are we…the Golden Girls? Are we afraid of the dark? Can’t they give the players a Red Bull or one of those 5 hour energy drink things? I don’t know, maybe they need a nap, a visit from a therapist or poked with a cattle prod…Whatever…all I know is that the current game-day schedule isn’t working when kickoff is past 8 bells. I’m just sayin.
The only thing worse than the team sucking late at night, is the manner in which I react to their ineptness. Tardy kickoff = extra cocktail time = more volatility = less desirable behavior = more broken decorative household items.
Please…help save a knick-knack …say no to late kickoffs.
The season should be on the line when the Sooners travel to Morgantown in late November and to Fort Worth in early December. Play well and lead the Sooners to a BCS game and his place in history will improve dramatically in the eyes of the Sooner Nation…play mediocre on the road like he did in El Paso Saturday night, and the result could be a return trip to El Paso in late December for his last game as a Sooner. Winning Sun Bowls are nice, but it doesn’t do much for your legacy…just ask the 1993 Sun Bowl MVP…former Sooner QB Cale Gundy.
Other than Kenny Stills…I wouldn’t have been able to recognize a single wide receiver if they hadn’t had their names on the back of their jersey’s.
Why did RJ Washington switch from wearing jersey #91 to #11? Unless he plans of getting a few snaps from center, it doesn’t make any sense. Speaking of RJ…did anyone else catch this little nugget from FOX Sports TV color commentator J. C. Pearson: “the experts are projecting RJ Washington as an outside linebacker at the next level”….excuse me? Look, I’m no expert, but how can you project a player to play a different position in the NFL, when he hasn’t shown the ability to play his current one in college? While I feel RJ has the ability to have a good to great season in his final year at OU…the fact is...based on what he has done in college…the only projection you could make in regards to his NFL future…is failure.
Defensive Lineman: One injury here and we are screwed. David King, who moved to tackle from DE, played well…but he, along with JaMarcus McFarland, had to play almost the entire game because we have no depth. Fatigue can lead to injury…something that the Sooners simply can’t afford at this position.
Speaking of Jamarcus McFarland, he has been average at best…certainly nowhere near the player the experts projected him to be coming out of high school…but he is on the team and playing…which is more than can be said for Casey Walker. Walker is listed as out with a non-football related issue. Reportedly, Walker is trying to decide if he wants to play anymore. Great...
Stacy McGee may have the desire to play, but unfortunately, the powers that be at OU don’t share that same sentiment. McGee is suspended indefinitely, rumored to be three more games…we really need him back cause evidently the coaches don’t think the young d-tackles are ready for meaningful action.
My other concern for the defense is at
Linebacker. I feel certain that Tom Wort
is a nice guy, a hoot at parties, polite to strangers and respectful to his
elders…but what Tom Wort is not…is a middle linebacker. He has relentless
effort and his speed allows him to cover backs out of the backfield…but his
lack of size results in him getting completely steamrolled out of the play way
to often…it also has made him susceptible to injury. Has anyone seen Cory Nelson? If you do see
him, please have him report to the Sooners defensive huddle immediately. His
presence is very much needed.
After being
a disaster last year, the defensive secondary might actually be one of the team
strengths this year. Tony Jefferson is a star. In my opinion
he is finally in the right position…which is at safety and not some sort of
hybrid d-back/linebacker thing. It looks like Mike Stoops is going to turn him
loose and let him just go play. Jefferson had at least two TD saving tackles against UTEP. Combined
with Aaron Colvin, the Sooners have
two great players in the secondary. A third player in Demontre Hurst that is above average…and there is also safety Javon Harris…well, ok…did I mention how
good Jefferson and Colvin are? Who is the UTEP kicking coach…Jimmy Stevens?
Just the opinions of one mildly interested guy
The Overweight Armchair Sooner
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