Hello, I'm Buddy Putty.
While its true that my birth certificate reads Weldon Reagan Putty III, the only people who have ever referred to me as such are those who want money from me ... Namely the IRS, credit card companies, and divorce attorney's.
There have been some who tried to change my name. When I was hired for my first job out of college, I was told by the man who hired me that my employment was contingent on my name now being Reagan. I didn't like it, but hey .... A guy's got to eat.
The mother of Plaintiff #2 (second ex-wife) also insisted on calling me Reagan, which is why I insisted on ignoring her when she did. To her credit, she also ignored me when I addressed her as bitch.
Yes, I've always been Buddy Putty. It's a nickname that originated with my grandfather, who had 7-older sisters. Evidently, he followed them around to the point that they were never without their little buddy. My dad also went by Buddy Putty, but I suspect that when you're 6'4" people are less obvious with their jokes and laughter.
To be honest, the name Buddy Putty has never really bothered me, it's just who I've always been. In fact, I didn't even know people would find it to be funny until I got to first grade ... but then I seemingly never went a day without it being brought to my attention that it was.
My second grade teacher refused to call me Buddy because she thought I was making it up, even sent me to the office. That was no longer the case after a visit from my father.
I had a phone operator hang up on me when she asked my name for the collect call I was trying to make. Then the inevitable jokes like Silly Putty, got to be old hat. Make fun if you must, but be original is all I ask.
But those laughs and taunts resulted in my arrival at an early crossroads in my life. I was either going to have to be funny - or really tough. The realization that funny hurt a lot less than tough made for an easy decision. As Terry Bradshaw once said, "I might be dumb, but I'm not stupid."
Over the years, I've learn a few things that have helped me with the moniker. For instance, I never just introduce myself as Buddy. To do so invites the new acquaintance to inquire ... and your last name is? Oh Lord, here we go.
After I introduce myself, occasionally, if I feel the situation warrants, I'll throw in a - "It's Buddy like your friend, Putty like you put in a window" or "I'm probably the only Buddy Putty you're going to meet today." I've also learned that when I get zero reaction at all, the person I just met either doesn't listen or doesn't give a shit what my name is, which can be some handy information in some circumstance.
Buddy Putty is also a name that is recognizable and a bit hard to forget ... and maybe forgive. Like the time when I was in high school and we were playing our main rival the Hugo Buffaloes. During a timeout, midway through the fourth quarter, the Hugo Band started chanting "Kill Buddy Putty" "Kill Buddy Putty", which I thought to be a bit harsh. My friend Hood Baldwin looks at me, smiled and said, "it's either (A) the 4-td passes you've thrown tonight, (B) you didn't call that Hugo baton twirler back like you said you would - but I'm guessing (C) - all of the above."
The one time that I can remember pushing back on my name was my freshman year in college at OU. We were having a party at the Delt House when a young coed approached me ... Is your name really "Buddy Putty?" "Yes, yes it is." I said firmly. "Is that a problem?"
Her eyes noticeably bulged and instantly got a little teary ... "Sorry, I just wanted to introduce myself. My name is Sandy Beach ... and I have two sisters, one named Pebble and another named Sandy ... but now I'm sorry that I bothered because you're an asshole." Yes, for me, funny is a much less painful way to go.
So it is with great pleasure and qualification that I introduce to you the The OAS 2024 Name All American Team.
May I just say - gentleman, I feel your pain
Just the Opinion of One Mildly Interested Guy
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