Tuesday, September 10, 2013

SAVED BY THE BELL - FOR NOW



OKLAHOMA        16
WEST VIRGINIA   7
 
 
"The back-up quarterback is often the fans favorite player on the team...until he plays" -George Allen
 
A KNIGHT OF UNREST
 
It was three minutes into the 3rd quarter and the Sooner Nation was starting to get impatient...

Three rows down from me in the all-to-polite donor section, a lady wearing to much makeup, a hideous custom made sequined OU shirt and a bow in her hair the size of a yield sign, stood up and bellowed "get him the hell out of there." 

Two rows behind me, an elderly man who had evidently left his miracle ear out in the Crown Victoria, shouted to his wife..."Madge, I don't believe this kid can play a lick."

And a faint chant had begun in the OU student section...'We Want Bell...We Want Bell... We Want Bell.'  

Yes, it took all of seven quarters for the inevitable to begin...the calls for backup QB Blake Bell had started. 

By the end of the 3rd quarter, Trevor Knight's own mother would have benched him. Knight was 1-5 passing  in the quarter with two devastating interceptions and fumble.  In addition to his hurt feelings, he also appeared to be limping.  Seems a couple of West Virginia defensive backs had recognized his inability to complete a forward pass; so when they weren't catching his balls, they were drilling them. 

"We Want Bell, We Want Bell, We Want Bell"...by now it didn't matter if the student section was chanting for Blake Bell, Maw Bell, Alexander Graham Bell or Screech from Saved by the Bell...they just wanted a change.

Evidently, Bob Stoops agreed.
 
BELL OF THE BALL

When Blake Bell buckled his chin strap and took the field with the rest of the offense, most of the 85,000+ at Memorial Stadium roared with obvious approval. With a precarious 13-7 lead, the Sooners would start the 4th quarter with the ball at their own 45, a fresh set of downs, a different quarterback and evidently...a shot of adrenaline. 

Blake would lead the Sooners down for what would in essence be the game clinching field goal.  Does it matter that Bell didn't complete a pass or do much more than hand off? No...not last Saturday night anyway.  To the Sooner Nation, OU was Saved by the Bell.  And so begins the Blake Bell era...

QB Kendal Thompson returns to practice this week...good thing...because he just became the newest fan favorite of the Sooner Nation.

I THINK MY EYES ARE BLEEDING
 
Wow…It was an ugly game and a strange night. 
 
Ugly...as in 17 penalties, 8 turnovers, innumerable injuries, countless booth reviews, dozens of punts and enough time-outs to make Supernanny want to give them up in favor of spankings with sharp objects - that kind of ugly.   The sound of a whistle...

(The previous sentence is under review.  The ruling on the blog is that the sentence makes perfect sense due to the fact the Supernanny made popular the phrase time-out as it pertains to child discipline)....
(After further review, the ruling on the blog stands.  Please reset the punctuation to show the period outside the parenthesis...OAS, you may proceed).
 
But in addition to ugly at least it was really long.  In the four hours it took for both teams to disrespect the good name of college football…I could have read War in Peace, stood in line at the DMV, grown a redwood tree and macramé a sweater. 
 
I know I shouldn’t really bitch.  I’m sure the game experience Saturday night could have been worse…but short of being forced to sit between my ex-mother-in-laws, asked to remain sober and the score be reversed at the end of the night…I don’t really know how.

And then I did.

There is a guy down the row from me that looks like he ate the Stay-Puff-Marshmellow man.   For the second time in four games, Jabba the Hut squashed and then drop kicked my Crown on the rocks while trying to waddle his way through and over me to the isle. This guy is so fat, that if he cuts himself, I swear he will bleed gravy.  It's bad enough that he punts my cocktail with one of his feet that he hasn't seen in 150 lbs...But by the time he wades through, over and around me; I feel like we have touched enough to be dating.

Here is a thought for you big guy…since moving around doesn’t appear to be your ‘thing’…how about you stuff a Twinkie or eight into those body pillows you call jowls. That will keep your fat-ass anchored to seats 15 thru 18 that you torture six times a year.   As a result, the lady in front of me won’t have to wear my libation home anymore and I can stop plotting your death. Everybody wins but the concession stand. Cool?


Tomorrow....
The OAS takes a deeper look at OU-WVA

Just the opinion of one mildly interested guy

The Overweight Armchair Sooner

Buddy Putty

  Editors Note:  In last weeks Blog, one of my sub-headings was "Was it over when the German's bombed Pearl Harbor?"  My mother thought I was serious...she didn't recognize or realize that I was using...what I thought...was a famous John Belushi line from Animal House.

So if anyone else out there was under the same impression as my mother and thought I was serious...please know that I was kidding.  Everyone know's it was the Chineese that bombed Pearl Harbor on that November 7th day in 1940.
  :)

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