SOONER MAGIC = TENNESSEE FALLINTEARS

OKLAHOMA 31 TENNESSEE 24 (2 OT)

“This team doesn’t have any heart” – The OAS

Okay, so maybe I was a little hasty in my judgement. 

But then again, what else is new? I’m the same guy who alleged that Keith Ford, who has since transferred, was the future at running back.  I predicted Mo Dampeer, who ended up being a better dancer than football player, would be a dominant, All-American defensive lineman…I also don’t view myself as being fat, I’m just a little too short for my weight. 

The Sooners struggled with field position from the word go

The trip had already been amazing, and totally worth the time, effort and cost…and not even an OU loss would change that.  But a victory would be a pretty sweet ending. Turns out the game we witnessed was even sweeter than anyone could’ve imagined.  Thanks to all the Tennessee fans who were so welcoming and accommodating, even after they had their hearts broken.  Nothing but pure class from the Rocky Top Nation.

Let’s look at why the Sooners got down 17 to the Vols, why the Vols couldn’t put the Sooners away, and why OU fans got to witness another edition of Sooner Magic.

Reasons Sooner Magic Would Be Needed

Slow start

For the second straight week the Sooners got off to a slow start offensively. A promising initial drive ended after a second down pass from Baker Mayfield bounced off the hands of Dede Westbrook and was picked off by the Vols.  It would be a while before the Sooners would see the Vols side of the field again.

Field position

The Sooners spent so much time inside their own red-zone that the Tennessee ground crew may have to replace the turf.  24 of the Sooners first 26 plays were from their own territory, with a large portion of those coming from inside their own 20.  I swear it seemed like the Sooners were trying to go uphill. But the reality is, the reason the Sooners couldn’t get out of the shadow of their own goal post was their own doing.

Dropped Balls.  

Shepard, Neal and Westbrook all dropped passes that would’ve either (1) resulted in a first down (2) given the Sooners a more reasonable distance for converting on 3^rd down or (3) allowed our punter the opportunity to kick the ball while standing on grass that wasn’t orange and white checkered.

Special Teams Decisions.  

The Tennessee punter was awesome, but Shepard didn’t help matters when he let a couple punts land and roll deep inside the 20. Alex Ross’ decision to return a kick from 6 yards deep in the end-zone, had the Sooners starting deep.  I know he was probably just trying to make something happen, but not only was the kick deep, it was very high as well…which means better kick coverage.

Penalties. 

Holding calls are absolute killers.  Converting 3^rd and 22 from your own 14 happens about as often as I order a salad at McDonalds...hardly ever and when I do, it’s for someone else.  Holding penalties also put your offensive in a bind when it comes to field position.  The bad decision Ross made to return the kickoff from deep in his own end zone was further compounded by a holding penalty. That being said, the fact that OU only had one delay penalty with that kind of crowd noise was very encouraging.

Offensive Line

I realize that we have two freshman at offensive tackles, but the problem is, they may be the best two lineman we have.  Kasiti is just getting abused, which makes him only slightly better than our center Ty Darlington.  This group needs to get better and soon.  They are the key to being better on the ground, which will give Mayfield a better chance to be effective in the passing game, not to mention a better chance to stay healthy.

Reasons There Was Still a Chance for Sooner Magic

Tennessee Head Coach Butch Jones

After Dede Westbrook volleyed a Baker Mayfield pass into the arms of a Vol defensive back on the Sooners first drive of the game, the Tennessee offense drove down inside the Sooner 10 yard line.  Facing 4 and goal at the Sooner half yard line, Butch Jones decided to kick the field goal instead of going for TD.  The OAS was unable to confirm whether or not Butch was able to change his tampon during the ensuing television timeout.     

 

Butch might like to have his decision to kick a field goal on first drive back

OU’s Ability to Put Pressure on Tennessee QB

This was huge reason the Sooners were able to rally back to win the game.  Every time Dobbs dropped back to throw he was under fire.  Because of the pressure he was either (1) inaccurate, 13 of 31 (2) ineffective, only 121 yards passing (3) or unable to hold on to the football. Dobbs fumbled twice, but for an inadvertent whistle, it would’ve been three times. If an over-served guy on the 50^th row could see that Dobbs is always under siege, I’m pretty sure that the Tennessee coaching staff probably picked up on it was well.  Rarely did the Vols throw again on 1^st and 2^nd down, which made them predictable, which meant the Sooners could pin their ears back on third down and send the house.

Josh Dobbs was under pressure all night

Clank & Shank

The Clank.  

On Tennessee’s first play from scrimmage to start the second half, Vols running Jalen Heard breaks one for 31.  On the next play, the Vols use a WR quick-screen for 20 more, setting them up 1^st and 10 and the OU twenty yard line. After a sack by Charles Walker, Vols QB scrambled to the right to avoid pressure and hit TE Alex Ellis in the hands, but Ellis was unable to hold on and make the catch. If he holds on, its probably...ballgame. 

The Shank. Unable to convert on third down, Tennessee was forced to settle for a 48 yard field goal attempt, which went further right than Rush Limbaugh.

Freshman Kicker Austin “Powers”

Yes, the kid had one shanked punt…but overall his punting, most of which came from deep inside OU territory, was the only reason the field position wasn’t even worse than it was for the Sooners. The kid nailed his only field goal attempt, and all his extra points were right down the middle, which, as we all learned last year, shouldn’t be taken for granted.

Another Edition of Sooner Magic

Referee Calls

Sooners didn’t catch many breaks in the way of referee calls early on in the game.  Replay wiped out a couple Sooner catches that would’ve moved the sticks, but the biggest issue came in the third quarter when an inadvertent whistle nullified what would’ve been a fumble return for a touchdown by Steven Parker. 

Tennessee fans might not agree, but a little bit of justice may have been served on the Sooners game tying drive.   The Vols were called for a questionable interference penalty on a ball that looked to be uncatchable.  Instead of facing 3^rd and 14 from the 31, OU was now 1st and 10 from Vols 16...obviously a huge difference.  The refs also missed what looked like an illegal motion penalty on the Sooners late in the game that was pretty big.

Defense

I can’t tell you how proud I was of the defense. Faced with their backs to the wall all night, they came up big, time and time again.  They tackled well for the most part, and the pressure they put on the QB Dobbs, was what helped turn the game around. I’m not ready to say that our defense is good, because I’m not sure we’ve faced a really good QB yet, but it’s safe to say they’re a hell of a lot better than they were a year ago.  OAS Game balls to Walker, Striker, Parker and Bond…Devonte Bond

Baker Mayfield

“What a gutsy QB he’s been in the 4^th quarter and overtime”

– ESPN Commentator, Brad Nessler

Baker missed a couple open receivers early and had two interceptions, but in my opinion, both were because of mistakes made by receivers.  His stats will look pedestrian at best, but the numbers certainly don’t tell the full sorry.

There is just something about this kid.  He has moxie, grit guts and a little brass about him…and I think the team feeds off of that.  His leadership and attitude helped lead the team back.  When the team struggled early in the game, he didn’t force the issue and make a mistake.  Mayfield made plays with his feet all night…scrambling to keep plays alive, with no better example being the touchdown pass he threw to Perine.

On the Sooners first play of overtime, his throw to Shepard over the middle helped get back some of the momentum that the Vols had just inherited with their OT touchdown. Then he made the perfect read on 4^th down from the one in overtime, keeping the ball and walking in to the end zone to tie the game at 24-24, forcing more free football.

 

Gutsy performance from our QB

Tennessee Fans

“There won’t be a third overtime” – The Vols fan sitting next to me

After OU scored first in the second overtime, I made mention to the Vols fan next to me, that if Tennessee forced a third overtime, then by rule, both teams would have to go for two after a touchdown.  Looking around at the crowd, his monotone reply above seemed to reflect what most Vol fans were feeling at that point, and judging from the body language of the Tennessee sideline, maybe the teams as well. Three plays later Zach Sanchez would make his words clairvoyant.  After the game it was hard not to feel for the Vol fans.  I said it was hard....not impossible.

 

Tennessee fans were loud, but Sooner fans made some noise themselves

Sterling Shepard. 

What a stud.  Big time players, come up big, in big moments, of big games. Sterling Shepard did just that.

 

Not sure it gets any better than that!

Heart.

Yes, my assessment that the Sooners didn’t have any heart, was wrong. They played with guts, never gave up and made the big plays in the big moments.  I guess, in hindsight, what I should have said was, “This team has some glaring issues that will one day get them beat.”  - I can only hope that they prove me wrong on that one too.

Just the opinion of one mildly interested guy

Buddy Putty

The Overweight Armchair Sooner

Oklahoma 31 Tennessee 24
Double Overtime

DAY 3 - GAME DAY - KNOXVILLE, TN

Terry woke me from my slumber coma about 8:00 AM. After picking around at what looked like some sort of breakfast items downstairs, it was time to start the process of preparing for a 15 hour day, most of which will be spent without access to a home, motel or vehicle. Believe me, when you have as many vices, superstitions and years spent alive as I do, that can be a much bigger task than you think. 

I’m not a huge fan of cargo shorts, mostly because I generally try to avoid clothing that gives me the appearance of being even more over-fed than I already am…but unless I’m going to hire a Sherpa, or can find a purse that matches my OU flip-flops, then shorts with storage are a necessary evil on game day.  Why?  Because on any given game day, I may or may not need, nor am I limited to, the following:

Flasks of crown (that’s plural…one for each half), cigars, lighter, cutter, wallet, phone, game ticket, lucky bandana, my Patrick Fletcher Bobble Head, the laces from Joe Washington’s silver shoes, cash, a tri-fold game roster, a signed 1st edition of Bootlegger’s Boy and the three blades of grass from I yanked from the Pro-Player Stadium end-zone after the 2001 Orange Bowl game. Okay, maybe I don’t carry around all of that…but your get the idea.

 

CALHOUN'S ON THE RIVER

We all met at…you guessed it….Calhoun’s on the River.  I’d like to give a shout out to Steve and Todd Humble for their effort in securing the best table in the place…thank you gentlemen!  Evidently, they camped out in tents, either that or they never left from the night before…either way….Our table was in the shade, tucked into a corner out of the way of traffic, while perfectly located to see anything and everything.  After several of us followed Styx lead and handed the waiter a $20 bill that was separate and in advance of the tip, our table suddenly became his top priority.

STEVE & TODD HUMBLE

The game day vibe in Knoxville was great.  There is a certain verve that accompanies big games…and the energy for this one was palpable.  In between the feasting of food and mass consumption of alcohol, there was the usual acts and episodes of buffoonery.  Styx inadvertently knocked McKnight’s 40 day old iPhone out of his hand…then they both watched helplessly as the $600 phone bounced once, took a sharp right turn, and then did a reverse, 2 ½ with a twist, into the Tennessee River.  

 

Styx & McKnight - Moments before McKnight's phone did a Greg Louganius into the river 

The Tennessee fans were tremendously friendly and excellent hosts….with many mentioning how much they appreciated the way they were treated the previous year in Norman.  Which is always nice to hear.

Obviously, with the stadium being located on the river, there is some “sail-gating” going on, but to be honest, not as much as I had envisioned.  Fast Eddie and his wife Heidi were part of a large group that spent the day on a luxury yacht, boating up and down the Tennessee River with Captain Stubing, Gopher, Isaac, Julie McCoy and the rest of the Love Boat gang.

The Vol Fans have a very cool tailgating area located just outside the main entrance of Nyland Stadium.  It’s a large tree covered area, adorned with the usual tailgate type stuff….Team Tents, BBQ pits, drunk frat kids, older woman with too much make-up and tablecloth covered card tables…but it had a vibe to it that was different and maybe better than other places I’ve been.  I’ve never gone to an Ole Miss game, but in my head, this is a tiny little version of what I vision The Grove to be like.

Neyland Stadium

Opened in 1921, with a capacity of 3200, the stadium was known as Shields-Watkins Field and cost $42,000 to build. In 1962, it was renamed Neyland Stadium in honor of General Robert Neyland.  Neyland, who was recently deceased, was the former athletic director, head coach and the man credited with making the Vols a national football power.  Neyland coached the team from 1926–1952, with two interruptions for military service.  Today, Neyland Stadium seats 102, 455, which makes it the 2^nd largest stadium in the SEC and sixth largest in the country.

Next Up:  

The Game: Sooner Magic = Tennessee FallinTears

Just the opinion of one mildly interested guy

Buddy Putty

The Overweight Armchair Sooner

McKnight & The OAS

Kick Off: OU vs Tennessee

DAY 2 - FRIDAY - KNOXVILLE, TN

Knoxville, TN

First settled in 1786, Knoxville was the original capital of Tennessee until 1817 when it was moved to Murfreesboro.  Located in Knox County, Knoxville is the third largest city in the state with a population around 180,000. 

During the Civil War, the city was bitterly divided over the secession issue, and was occupied alternately by both Confederate and Union armies.  Following the war, Knoxville grew rapidly as a major wholesaling and manufacturing center. The city's economy stagnated after the 1920s as the manufacturing sector collapsed, the Downtown area declined, and city leaders became entrenched in highly partisan political fights.

Hosting the 1982 World's Fair helped reinvigorate the city, and revitalization initiatives by city leaders and private developers have had major successes in spurring growth in the city, especially the downtown area.

University of Tennessee

Knoxville is also home to the University of Tennessee Volunteers.  Founded in 1794, the university has an undergrad enrollment of just over 21,000. Some of the notable graduates of the University of Tennessee include: author Alex Haley, 1986 Nobel Peace Prize Recipient James Buchanan and former Dallas Cowboy Bill Bates.

DAY 2

Terry and Styx, who evidently get up with Willard Scott every morning, let me sleep until about 9.  We loaded up the rental car, merged into the flow of traffic on I-40 E and arrived in Knoxville two and a half hours and a time change later.

 

TERRY AND THE OAS AT CALHOUN'S

After throwing our bag in the room, we headed down to a place called Calhoun’s On the River www.calhouns.com  I don’t know, maybe people in Knoxville are tired of this place, or they think it sucks, but I thought the place was awesome.  It had a huge deck (careful how you say that) and as the name might suggest, was located on the river, about ¾ of a mile from Neyland Stadium. The place was packed with Sooners by a ratio of about 8-1 the entire weekend.

 

CALHOUN'S ON THE RIVER - W/ NEYLAND STADIUM IN THE BACKGROUND

After spending most the day at Calhoun’s, we decided to take a tour to get the lay of the land. Campus was nice, handsome, but not pretty by any means.  At OU, Styx and I were both members of the Delta Tau Delta fraternity…so when we saw the Delt Tennessee chapter, Styx decided to go in and chat the guys up as to where the best places to go that night.  While I can’t say enough about how friendly and welcoming the Tennessee fan base was, the same can’t be said for the UT Delt Chapter.  The only people that didn’t ignore Styx, were the ones who asked him to leave.

THE UT DELT HOUSE - NOT SO FRIENDLY BROTHERS

After the hour or so tour, we moved up the hill from Calhoun’s for cocktails and dinner at Ruth’s Chris, which also looked out over the river.

RUTH'S CHRIS

About 8:30, we headed down to a place called Market Square.  If I were a member of the chamber of commerce, I would describe Market Square as “an eclectic blend of culinary delights with music, performers, niche shops and gallery walks. Adjacent to the scenic Krutch Park, Market Square is a place for all ages…but since I’m not the chamber…

DON'T LET THE PICTURE FOOL YOU...BRING A WEAPON AND EAR PLUGS

I’d describe Market Square to be…an eclectic blend of weirdo’s, with live music that makes you start losing the will to live, shops with nothing you’d ever buy, and places you’d walk only if you have your own personal security. The only reason you'd bring a child down here is because you needed a public place to exchange them for the ransom.

When Styx went to use one of the port-a-pot’s located in the square, he pulled open the door to find the largest, wide-eyed black man I’ve ever seen staring him down, and then threaten to kill him.  The bar we bellied up in, Preservation Pub, would’ve reminded me of a half-way house…if a half-way house had scarier looking people.  I wanted to leave the minute I saw the 400 lbs. voodoo fortune teller who was slumped against the wall.  Look, it’s not like I’m a bar rookie, as much time as I spend in bars, I should be receiving my mail at one of them, but this place wasn’t for the faint of heart…and that was before the live music started.

 

PLEASE GET ME THE HELL OUT OF THIS PLACE

Of course, Styx is ordering Fireball shots like they’re chick-lets…which would’ve been fine if I could’ve poured them in my ears…because the music was making my ears bleed.  Minutes after Styx picked up on the fact that I’d rather eat a bullet than listen to this shit, he buys me the band's CD and a t-shirt "Funk is Alive"...I just wish I wasn't.

Then he says to me...“Hey, the good news is, when your phone starts playing video’s in the middle of their next set, no one will hear it or care.”

Somebody please ask them to play Free Bird.

DAY 1 - THURSDAY - NASHVILLE / PART 1

"You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning"

By noon-thirty on Thursday, Styx, Terry and I found ourselves downtown on 2nd street, which is home to some of Nashville's most legendary venues, like the Ryman and Tootsie's, which is located just across the alley from the Ryman.  Tootsie's is where people like Willie Nelson, Patsy Cline, Kris Kristofferson, Waylon Jennings and Roger Miller hung out before, during and after playing across the street at the Ryman.

The Legendary Tootsies

In Nashville, you can find live music being played pretty much any time of day.  At places like Honkey Tonk Central, which has stages on three different floors, the bands start at 10:30 AM. Now whether they're any good or not, that's a different story.

Not so legendary Honkey Tonk Central

Most of the afternoon drinking damage was done at a place called Roberts Western Wear.  They had a great house band that played the more traditional style of country music. Hours of drinking beer now gave way to crown on the rocks, and the first of what would become a bad habit over the next few days: Fireball shots.  

Drinking a fireball shot is like getting sexually violated by a smoldering candy cane while gulping Scope…there’s just nothing right about it.   

Roberts Western Wear

About 5:00, we headed over to 16th avenue so Styx could see Music Row.  As you can see from the guitar photos, blood alcohol levels were far exceeding maturity at this point...and would only get worse.

Styx outside of RCA Studio's on Music Row

But the highlight of the day came that night at a place called the Blue Bird Cafe.

The Blue Bird Cafe, is a small Nashville music cafe that opened in 1982. The club has become famous over the years for what is known as Writer’s Night or Writer’s In the Round.  This is where 4 well-known, accomplished songwriters sit in the center of the room and take turns telling stories and playing the songs/hits that they’ve written over theyears.  What makes it special for those in attendance is the intimacy of the venue. Even if you’re sitting at the worst table in the place, you’ll still be less than 40 feet from the circle of artists. www.bluebirdcafe.com

My sister is friends with Chris Wallin, an extremely talented songwriter who has written numerous top hits for some big named artists like Montgomery Gentry, Kenny Chesney and Trace Adkins.  When Laura saw that Chris was playing In the Round that night at the Bluebird, she called him and he was generous enough to reserve us a front row table. (www.chriswallin.com)

Because of the close proximity and intimacy discussed above, there is a certain patron protocol that is understood and adhered to when attending the Bluebird Café.  I’ve been to the Bluebird numerous times, and Terry’s been twice as many times as I have. But since Styx was a Bluebird virgin…and since all three of us were frat-party, shit-faced, Charlie Sheen drunk…Laura decided it might be a good idea to give us the “Please don’t act like a moron speech.” 

Loosely translated, the moron speech goes something like this:(1) “Remember, conversations are highly frowned upon inside the Bluebird…that means no cracking jokes, no heckling the artist, no laughing at the expense of others…and under no circumstances are you to yell out “Free Bird” if one of the writers is acknowledging request (2) Getting up from our table should be for bathroom emergencies only. It ceases to be an emergency, if on the way to the bathroom, you stop off at the bar for a Fireball shot…And most importantly (3) turn off your cell phones.  If I see you texting, or God forbid, should I hear a peep from your phone, I will f-ing kill you right there on the spot.”

(L to R) Peyton Smith, Buddy Cannon & Chris Wallin (not pictured) Marla Cannon
I am sitting directly behind Peyton, close enough he can probably smell the Fireball

The other writers who joined Chris Wallin, were also big names. There was Buddy Cannon, who currently produces Kenny Chesney and has written several big hits, including “Give it Away” a song George Strait took to #1 in 2006.  There was also Marla Cannon, Buddy’s daughter, whose song credits include the Rodney Atkins hit “Still Cleanin’ this Gun.” But it was a 15 year old kid named Peyton Smith, who was sitting about 24” in front of me, who absolutely stole the show.  This kid is an incredible singer, fabulous guitar player and extremely talented writer.  After watching this kid, Styx and I have pretty much decided that we were probably witnessing the future of country music.

And then it happened....

DAY 1 - THURSDAY - NASHVILLE - PART 2

(L to R) Peyton Smith, Buddy Cannon & Chris Wallin (not pictured) Marla Cannon

I am sitting directly behind Peyton, close enough he can probably smell the Fireball

And then it happened….As young Peyton was sharing the story behind the ballad he was about to play, his story was interrupted by…Mayfield from the shot-gun, he takes the snap, drops back to pass, has pressure, he steps up in the pocket and throws deep over the middle for Westbrook.  Dede Westbrook makes a sensational catch at the 30.  He’s at the 25, 20, 15, 10, touchdown Oklahoma Sooners!

Turns out, if you exit in the middle of an ESPN video that you’re watching on your phone without properly closing that video app, there’s a good chance that video might start playing again without provocation, and when it does, the fact that your ringer is turned off, matters absolutely none. 

To make matters worse, I didn’t instantly react because (A) I was drunk and (B) I was too busy looking around to see who the moron was that didn’t turn off their phone.  When I finally realized the moron was me, it went from bad to worse. 

First, I couldn’t get the phone out of my pocket.  When you’re fat and drunk, sometimes the extent of your dexterity is to mumble obscenities and flail around like a beached whale in an effort to get your hand into your pocket.

After pulling out 86 cents in loose change, 7 receipts and 4 balls a lent, I was finally able to pull the phone out…which was just about the time the video stopped. I guess this was for dramatic effect, because 5 seconds later the video starts all over again.  Since the phone was no longer in my pocket, the volume was no longer muffled, so it sounded like the play-by-play was being done by the lead singer of Poison…Mayfield from the shot-gun, he takes the snap, drops back to pass, has pressure, he steps up in the pocket and throws deep over…

I’m so rattled now that it takes me two tries just get to the pass code screen…and then my first three password attempts got rejected like a salad at Kirstie Alley’s house… the middle for Westbrook.  Dede Westbrook makes a sensational catch at the 30…

Just in case the entire Bluebird café hadn’t noticed, I decided to bring a little more attention to the train wreck by blurting out, “Goddamn it, I can’t shut this fucking thing up.” If I’d somehow found a way to work in a Free Bird request during the episode, I’m pretty sure it would’ve been a moron speech hat-trick.

The whole thing probably took 15-20 seconds, but I’m pretty sure it took at least a year off the end of my life.  The incident had resulted in my being cut off by the waitress, made fun of by one of the songwriters and disowned by my sister...but all in all, nothing I hadn’t dealt with before.

But that was before ground hog day happened…Mayfield from the shot-gun, takes the snap, drops back to pass, has pressure, he steps up in the pocket, and throws deep over the middle for Westbrook.  Dede Westbrook makes a sensational catch at the 30.  He’s at the 25, 20, 15, 10, touchdown Oklahoma Sooners!

This time my Tourette’s kicks in immediately.  In between expletives, I decide the best thing to do is get up and move to the back of the café, destroy my phone and then take my own life and save my sister from a prison sentence.  It was a solid plan, except for the commotion I caused by knocking over my chair and inadvertently elbow the 15 year old country music wonder boy in the back of the head while he’s trying to sing a ballad about his sick grandmother.

Back at the table, Laura is trying to quietly find her keys so she can go get her pistol out of the car, while Styx is staring at the floor and practically turning blue from trying to suppress the tsunami of laughter that is brewing inside him.  I’d go back and sit down, by that would require me to repair my chair and apologize to kid Chesney…the result of which would no doubt send Styx over the edge. Styx never went more than 15 minutes the rest of the weekend without telling someone the story or reminding me about it.  Oh well, it could've been worse...at least I didn't ask the kid to play Free Bird.

Somehow I managed to get through the rest of the In the Round without an ESPN Sports Center Update...but I'm pretty sure my sister will be reminding me of Blue Bird iPhone Video-Gate the rest of whatever life I have left.

$47.67 worth of Krystals burgers, chicks and pups later and we were back at my sisters and ready to shut it down. 

Day 1 was in the books and it was a duzzie...but turns out, we were just getting started.

SOONERS HANDLE ZIPS IN OPENER

I’ve learned over the years that making a proclamation or passing judgement after only one game, whether it be on the entire team, the offensive or defensive unit, or even a particular player, is like thinking I know all about a woman after only one date…the probability that I’m wrong is usually very high, and the consequences suffered as a result are usually somewhat uncomfortable or even painful.

So with that in mind, here are a few of my thoughts after watching the Sooners season opening performance against the Akron Zips last Saturday night:

MISC…

What the hell is a ‘Zip’?  Zips," is a shortening of "Zippers," a pair of rubber overshoes and a brand name of the BF Goodrich Company of Akron. It was originally adopted by the school in 1925 after a contest to give the school a nickname.  Which makes me wonder, if Zippers was the winner, what the hell were the other choices? Douche-bags? Ass-stains?

In case being named after a rubber boot wasn’t bad enough, the school mascot, adopted in 1953, is a female kangaroo named Zippy.  Which, I guess, explains why there was a cartoon ‘roo, with eyes that indicated either anger or constipation, on the back of the Akron helmets.  Regardless, it’s all adds up to the worst mascot in the history of athletics.

Freshman: Seven true freshman played against the Zips, including P.J. Mbanasor, who started at safety.  Safe to say I’ll be referring to him as P.J. only from this point on.

THE DEFENSE

To me, the defense is the real area of concern for this team.  If the Sooners are to return to top 10 or top 5 status, then this unit will have to be much improved from the debacle we witnessed on the field in 2014.  Whether it’s fair or not, anything positive that happens in a game like this should be tempered because of the opponent…but that being said, I thought there were some positive signs on the defensive side of the ball.

Let’s All Just Get Along.  To start with, there were no contentious confrontations between Mike Stoops and Sooner defensive backs. Maybe that’s because Mike was in the press box.

Air Pressure. The Sooners only gave up 88 yards passing…which would’ve been the opponents total after the 1^st quarter last year, regardless of who it was.

True That. The Sooner defense seemed more reactive and less confused…they also weren’t staring at the sidelines when the ball was snapped. Coincidence?  Not to the OAS.

Dominate Dominique.  The Sooner linebackers looked bigger, faster and more aggressive, especially Dominique Alexander.

All together now.  The tackling was very solid and often by more than one Sooner

Kangaroo Hunter. Charles Walker had a great game. 3 tackles, a sack and a forced fumble

THE OFFENSE

3 & out X 3.  Three straight three and out possessions to start the game was not a confidence builder, especially when you throw in holding penalties and the o-line getting pushed around like a fork at Rosie O’Donnell’s house.

Offensive Line: Uh-oh.  I’m trying not to panic, but between the penalties and the fact that the offensive line was getting blown off the line of scrimmage early in the game, by an undersized, inferior opponent, is a big concern to me. It was so bad that I thought Darlington and Kasitati might be wearing roller skates instead of cleats, but turns out they were just getting their ass kicked.  Don’t know whether it’s their mentality, talent, or technique, but something needs to be adjusted, and soon.

Hello, Jarvis Baxter.  As sad as this may sound, I usually know something about, or I've at least heard of every Sooner player that takes the field.  But when the TV announcer stated, "Jarvis Baxter, making the catch for the Sooners," I had a big bag of nothing.  Turns out Jarvis Baxter, who caught 5 passes against Akron, is a walk-on from Garland, TX, who transferred to OU after playing two seasons of Juco ball.  Hmm. I'm not sure what to think about that since he’s only been practicing with the team since August 6^th.  Either Jarvis is very smart and talented or the rest of our highly recruited wide-receivers suck...or I guess, both.  Let’s hope it’s the former.

Baker Mayfield.  I thought Baker looked pretty good for his first outing since 2013. Early on the o-line was getting pushed around and he had some balls dropped but he didn’t panic or try to make something happen when it wasn’t there like he was prone to do his freshman year at Tech.  I love how he (1) spread the ball around, with 10 different receivers getting a catch (2) including the tight end Andrews, who caught 4 balls on the night.  Overall, I give Baker an A, but he’ll need more from the o-line and running game to be as effective when facing a better opponent, that much I can promise you.

Not Your Average Joe. Mixon definitely made a big impact in his debut.  His 75 yard TD reception was the longest in school history by a running back.  I don’t know what it is though…maybe it’s just me, but there’s just something about his #25 that doesn’t look right on him.

New Year – Same Trevor. Trevor Knight came in and looked great, right up until it mattered.  That’s when he threw a balloon into the end zone that was easily intercepted by the Zips. That one play, is a great example of why he’s no longer the starting quarterback.

SPECIAL TEAMS

Our best player for a large portion of the game was a freshman kicker.  Austin Seibert, our true freshman kicker/punter was outstanding at both.  Man, I really hate complimenting kickers, especially a freshman who’s about to kick on the road for the first time, in front of 110,000 no less…but Seibert’s performance deserves being recognized. So Austin, please don’t get the shanks in Knoxville on Saturday and make me regret saying something nice about an f%#@ kicker.

Just the Opinion of One Mildly Interested Guy

Buddy Putty - The Overweight Armchair Sooner

DEAR BAKER

Hello, Baker.  This is the OAS.  I just wanted to drop you a note to congratulate you on being named the starting QB for the Oklahoma Sooners.  Like the rest of the Sooner Nation, I'm very excited about the upcoming season and I feel certain that you'll do a great job leading the team.

As I'm sure you're well aware, there are a lot of expectations that come with being the starting QB at the University of Oklahoma.  Some of these expectations are reasonable, while others admittedly, may be a tad much to ask from a young man that hasn't played a single down in a real game since 2013.

Overall, we've been very blessed at the QB position during the Stoops era. Seven different QB's have won conference championships.  Three different QB have lead the Sooners to BCS National Title games.  Two have won Heisman Trophies, and one, Josh Heupel, lead the Sooners to an undefeated season and the schools 7th National Championship.  But, that being said, things have become a little shaky at the QB position, as of late, so it's important that you get us back on track.

With that in mind, I thought I'd take a minute to go over a few things, offer a little friendly advice. While some of this may seem pretty obvious, I thought I'd throw it out there anyway since some of the other QB's didn't seem to pick up on it.  Baker, if you'll follow these simple guidelines, I feel certain that you'll do just fine.

Don't embarrass the Program: Please remember that you're the man, the leader, the face of the program.  This is no small thing, just ask Florida State and Texas A&M.  If you need an example to follow, you could do worse than to emulate the young man whose job you just took. Trevor Knight is a good student, a good teammate and an even better person.  He is active in the community, often speaks on the FCA circuit and was even part of a group from Oklahoma that went to Haiti to work with orphanages this past May.  So Baker, if given the opportunity, it wouldn't hurt for you to help an old lady across the street or rescue a kitten from a tree...I'm just sayin.'

Avoid Vehicles: Please don't fall out of the back of them like Brent Rawls, steal them like Hunter Wall, or pretend to sell them like Rhett Bomar. In fact, unless it's the team bus, I recommend that you just call Uber and just stay the hell away from all other vehicles whenever possible.

Alcohol: Look, when I was in college, my major was Hall's, which is short for Pool Hall, Study Hall & Alcohol, so I'm not going to judge you if you tip one back every now and again.  But please, be smart about it.  Knocking down a few Bud Light's while sitting court side at a Thunder game in front of 15, 000 people like the afore mentioned, underage Bomar did - not smart.

Personal grooming: Please do not grow a porn-stache like Landry Jones.  Does this really need any further explanation?

Please avoid injury.  If Trevor Knight was a horse, the trainers would've had to euthanize him long ago.  Since being named the starter before the 2013 season, Knight has had a hurt ankle, arm, shoulder, rib, head, ear lobe, eyebrow and feelings.  I'm not trying to make light of the serious head injury he suffered last year against Baylor, but the fact is, Knight has spent more time with doctors the past couple of years than a female companion of Sam Ukuwachu's.

Don't Go Brain Dead: I'm still in therapy because of the Landry Jones years, so please protect the football when you move around the pocket.  That's all I can say on this subject without my Tourette's Syndrome kicking in.

Just Say No: If your offensive coordinator asks you to throw a 5 yard out, from your own goal line when the defense is in man to man coverage, please don't. Just hand off to Perine, or Mixon or give the bird to the press box and run a QB sneak.  I don't care what you do, just be smart enough to just say no.

Please don't be a one hit wonder.  Yes, we need to talk about the Sugar Bowl.  Having a great game out of the blue like Trevor Knight did, confuses people and causes them to say stupid things...not to mention the fact it can have a real domino effect on the team.  Before the Sugar Bowl, the Sooners had three QB's, none of which had been consistent enough to win the position. Three is fine if your talking about Blind Mice, Little Pigs or male sexual fantasies, but having three average to below average QB's...that's not a good thing.  

Four quarters, three and a half hours and a big night on Bourbon Street later and Blake Bell is a TE, Kendal Thompson becomes a Mormon and moves to Utah and Trevor Knight is a 2014 Heisman candidate.  Hell, if getting lucky one night in the Big Easy makes you a Heisman candidate, then I should be writing a possible acceptance speech not a blog entry.

Be A QB:  Play well enough that coaches don't view you as a better fit at another position, like Tight End (Bell) or Wide Receiver (Thompson) or Right Field (Thomas) or Prison Inmate (Bomar/Wall).

Throw to people you know: Your jersey number has me a little concerned. As long as your throwing touchdowns, #6 is fine.  But a nickname like Pick 6 would be way to easy to latch on to should you start throwing game changing interceptions like Jones and Knight have done the last few years.  Be smart with the football.  Be willing to throw the ball away to avoid a sack or turnover.  But when you do throw it, be as accurate as Sam Bradford was when he was here, you do that and things will be fine.

Don't Say Goodbye: I just hope your transfer days are over because we need you to hang around. To many QB's have left the program prematurely.  Rhett Bomar left for Sam Houston State, Hunter Wall left for a State Correctional Facility, Keith Nicols left for Michigan State, Justice Hansen left for Butler CC, Drew Allen left for Syracuse, Brett Rawls just left and I think Noah Allen left to be in the witness protection program.  Tommy Grady and Kendal Thompson wanted to leave so bad they were willing to become Morman's and move to Utah to be a Ute, whatever the hell that is.

Throw the Deep Ball: I'm about three bubble screens away from climbing a tower with a high power rifle.  Please throw the ball deep occasionally, and if you could do so with the accuracy that Jason White did, but without the limp, that'd be great.

Be Big Game Baker: There is this little thing called OU-Texas.  It's played every year in Dallas at the Cotton Bowl, on the second Saturday of October.  I'm not gonna lie, its a big deal...but you can't let the moment paralyze you.  Look, I realize this advice is coming from a guy who will be drunk by 11 AM and sitting in the upper deck, but try not to let the emotions get to you so badly that you piss down both legs while running down the ramp.  If you do, you might end up throwing it to a Longhorn defensive lineman that runs over you like your roadkill on his way to the end zone...just ask Blake Bell.

Road Sweet Road: It took Landry Jones almost three years to win an important game on the road.  We're hoping you win your first one a mere 9 days from now.  We don't care that you'll have played only one game (Akron) since 2013.  We don't care that you'll be facing a SEC opponent, at night, in front of 110,000 hostile, dentally challenged, Rocky Top singing Volunteer fans. We need you to play well enough to give the Sooners a chance to win.  And get use to it because there are trips to Dallas, Manhattan, Waco and Stillwater that will be equally important as the season goes on.

Lastly, all we ask is that you win them all: Last, I would advise you that the best thing to do, is what Josh Heupel did in 2000, just go out and win every game.  I know, I know, that seems a lot to ask...so if not every game, then at least get us into the playoffs.   Look, bottom line is, at $150.00/hour, I can't afford the therapy associated with another 8-5 season, so like the rest of the Sooner Nation, I'm looking to you to make sure that doesn't happen again.  

I like you Baker Mayfield.  I like that fact that you came here and walked-on without even asking the coaches.  I like the fact that you weren't scared off by the competition...by the fact that the incumbent starter Trevor Knight, who had just won the Sugar Bowl MVP by shredding Alabama, was only a red-shirt freshman.  I like the fact that your reportedly a little cocky, that you like to talk a little trash and I definitely like the fact that you can dance....But this isn't Dances with the Stars.  You're going to have to show us now that your the right guy to lead this team, that you won't melt in big games and that you won't make game changing mistakes at critical moments.  It's your turn Baker Mayfield....Now go get 'em, and just remember, I'm behind you 100%, until of course, I'm not.

Just the Opinion of One Mildly Interest Guy

Buddy Putty

The Overweight Armchair Sooner